The Rafan Electronic Bible 1
E-Bible Archives, Chapters 1-40
Date: Friday, April 9, 1999 at 18:58:40
Entry:
Chapter One
And Barney didst see the guest book and didst se that the guest book was good. And it came down from the heavens unto the frolicking, dancing Rafan children that the "guest book" would now be the...
Official Rafan Web Bible
Number 1.
God didn't know how everything was gonna work out right away, but he figured that Rafans (or anyone) could post messages here, which would either stay here or get transferred to the existing Web Bible link as necessary. God did see that the whole system may get changed around in slight ways now and again, but God thought that would be cool.
Name: KTKOF
Date: Saturday, April 10, 1999 at 01:17:09
Entry:
CHAPTER 2
And the Keeper of Friendship did see that the page had progressed quite well. Rafanism was surely approaching a great era of Inter-netty greatness.
KTKOF also wishes a great Hoo-Ha and A-Fille-Hee-Cat to all Rafans who did mail order for PHISH tickets. May your glorious tickets arrive with haste.
Name: Mirth
Date: Saturday, April 10, 1999 at 09:42:24
Entry:
Chapter 3
And so it was that Al the Keeper of Mirth dids't try to conact every Frisbee-golf playing Rafan and Groupie in his town, but alas, everyone was asleep or not there.
Oh, dids't the Keeper want to play and smoke!
So ends Chapter 3. Hoo Ha!
Name: Ken the Keeper of Friendship
Date: Saturday, April 10, 1999 at 22:34:41
Comments:
CHAPTER 4
The Keeper of Friendship did realize what a funny thing it was to write in the E-bible. First of all, he had become unaccustomed to recording his Rafan thoughts for all other Rafans to see. Of course, a traditional Bible is active, but it is not generally written in on a daily basis.
More than this though, the E-bible is on the inter-net where ANYONE can see it. Now, traditionally, Rafans have been open to anyone viewing the bibles if they wanted to, so I am totally in favor of the electronic media. It's just strange is all I'm saying.
Anyway...
...to brake in the new and wonderful and most holy great and wonderful (ohhh, I said that already) E-bible, I am going to write the
ELECTRONIC SERMON
My fellow Rafans, Rafan groupies, random viewers, I have gathered you here today to talk about electricity. Now you may look at a lightbulb and say, "That, that my friend, is electricity." You may look at lightning and say, "That, my friend, that surely without a doubt, is electricity." But you know, you'd be wrong. For electricity is a greater power and force than we can imagine. It is the force that holds atoms together and the electronic signals that bring the Rafan virtual land to life.
Perhaps we, as Rafans could take a lesson from electrons. Electrons are like great adventurers, pulled by forces beyond their control into swirling systems of sub-systems of sub-systems. Although the electrons can not control their paths, a higher power has designed there path to have meaning.
As Rafans we are like the electrons in the toaster of Barney Christ. Barney sets the darkness to his desired level, pushes on the handle thing, and trillions of trillions of little Rafans rush this way and that in a beautiful pattern. We as Rafans cannot know what the purpose (or purposes) of our many Rafan adventures is (or are), but we can trust in Barney Christ, Agent Jay and the holy Rafan Spirit that they will have meaning that will become clear to us all.
Name: Mirth
Date: Sunday, April 11, 1999 at 12:47:06
Comments:
Chapter 5 And the Keeper of Mirth dids't thank the Keeper of Frienship for his awesome sermon. The new Bible dids't remind Mirth of the days of Rafanism's Birth, where both Keepers were virtually (no pun intended) the only Rafans to write in the Bible. However, like the past, Mirth dids't hope that soon other Rafans would begin to add to this glorious new Bible.
Name: KTKOF
Date: Sunday, April 11, 1999 at 20:31:26
Comments:
CHAPTER SIX KTKOF did have a slow and boring Sunday. Much homework was done, but the elusive "Rafan party favors" that would have made the day less boring were just out of reach. The Death Fuckers must have been playing their naughty little games again.
Name: Mirth
Date: Sunday, April 11, 1999 at 21:39:53
Comments:
Chapter Seven
And so dids't the Keeper of Mirth console the Keeper of Friendship in his Rafan woes. Cheer up! Someone talked to Saul!
Name: KTKOF
Date: Sunday, April 11, 1999 at 22:52:58
Comments:
CHAPTER 8 yeah
Portions of this site last updated 01/28/2000. Try to find where!
All material contained within Copyright 2000 rafansrule.org
Name: Barney Christ
Date: Monday, April 12, 1999 at 13:27:21
Comments:
Chapter Nine
And so dids’t Barney Christ come from where he was (he’s a little secretive) and spake in a loud booming voice, "Rafans, your web site is truly neat. I wish that you would have more drawings of other characters than just the Snooze and Coctyle. Where is my picture? What about your protector, Agent Jay? I want more pictures!"
Then a lightning bolt came from the sky and crackled niftily.
Oh Rafans who read this page, make your drawings and mail them to the Keeper of Mirth.
Name: The TOT
Date: Monday, April 12, 1999 at 20:55:50
Comments:
Chapter TEN The TOT doeht approve highly of the new E-bible. How about we celebrate this new era of didgital rafanism with a real live FEAST!!!!!!!!? We just need to pick a city to have it in.
Name: KTKOF
Date: Monday, April 12, 1999 at 22:33:46
Comments:
Hoo-Ha
KTKOF had an exam today that went pretty well. Not perfect, mind you, but pretty well. He also had a good night's fun with Mirth, who could temporarily be called "Mirth the story-teller," but that's another subject.
And glory went up to haven and bounced back to earth in celebration of the Tot's first glorious chapter in the "E-bible 1."Rafanism is truly at a "high" point. (IYKWIM, "high," you know, like "getting high.") But I digress.
Anyway, may Barney Christ be with you, and may your whatevers be lined with etc.... or something.
Name: Mirth
Date: Tuesday, April 13, 1999 at 09:41:52
Comments:
Chapter 12 And so it was that the Keeper of Friendship's chapter do strange things to the Bible. It did perplex the Keeper of Mirth much. Does anyone else see things in a script font after chapter 11? Mighty strange.
Name: KTKOF
Date: Thursday, April 15, 1999 at 17:45:52
Comments:
CHAPTER 13
a SECRET MESSAGE:
Three points to the Rafan triangle:
Sustenance,
Beauty,
Mirth.
Name: Mirth
Date: Thursday, April 15, 1999 at 18:24:45
Comments:
Chapter 14
And so dids't the Keeper of Friendship's previous chapter wreak havok across the land, for if any one person who posts a chapter in a font that the reader does not have on their computer, weird characters shall appear instead of text. It's a good thing the the Keeper of Mirth can view the text without needing the font... He's the "keeper" of this web site! ;-P
I recommend that we either have a list of certain "friendly" fonts to use, or have a separate page where anyone can download special fonts that we have/will use. Wot say ye, Rafans?
Name: mirth
Date: Friday, April 16, 1999 at 16:24:09
Comments:
Chapter 15 And so it was that the Keeper of Mirth's forced vacation dids't come to an end, with the call from his employer telling him that he should come back. This poses a new problem.... the Keeper of Mirth may not be able to go on tour this summer now.....
Name: The TOT
Date: Saturday, April 17, 1999 at 04:21:41
Comments:
Chapter 16 The TOT doeth remind the Keeper of mirth that goin on the Phish tour will be a religous experience and that he must do whatever it takes to get there especially since he already ordered tickets. gosh darnit
Name: Mirth
Date: Saturday, April 17, 1999 at 09:37:07
Comments:
Chapitre Dix-Sept
The Keeper of Mirth dids't realise the religious experience that he coulds't be missing out on. However, he will not be able to use any vacation time until August. However, Mirth's wife has already stated that she believes he will take the new Rafan Party Machine with him on tour...
YEEOW!!!!
Name: dr. benway
sumguy@iname.com
Date: Saturday, April 17, 1999 at 13:24:04
Comments:
How can I belong if I am short?
Name: KTKOF
Date: Saturday, April 17, 1999 at 16:13:55
Comments:
Anyway, with Mirth in mind, I propose a Rafan prayer/ poemem::::::::
Work, work, work, work
Play Play
Work, work, work, work
Play Play
Work, work, work
Play Play Play
Work, work
Play.
Name: KTKOF
Date: Sunday, April 18, 1999 at 17:35:25
Comments:
So ends chapter 19
Hoo-Ha
Name: The TOT
Date: Sunday, April 18, 1999 at 22:56:18
Comments:
Chapter 20 The TOT sits with mixed emotions. I'm sad because my good friend The Spirit won't be returning to the birthplace of rafanism as origionally hoped. But I amd happy that he wont be coming back because he got a REAL PAYING ACTING JOB!!!!! A-Fillee-Hee-Cat!! to The Spirit from The TOT on your new gig.
Name: Mirth
Date: Sunday, April 18, 1999 at 23:34:14
Comments:
Chapter 21 The Keeper of Mirth dids't give many congratulations to the Spirit. Huzzah! Now of I only could have gone down to Chicago..... The Keeper of Mirth also would'st also like to welcome the newest Rafan into our midst - Jo Jo the Wonder Somethingorother!
So Ends 21
Name: Buttercup
Date: Monday, April 19, 1999 at 00:11:14
Comments:
<b><center>Chapter 22 Friends, rafans, honeymelons..lend me your ears, for this weekend I was truely one of the blessed. I was once down and out in the birth place of Rafanism. But now I have been healed by the holy hands of Barney Christ. By his guidance, I was visited by not one but two of my fellow Rafans, from which I had not heard a whole hell of a lot. The ToT and The Keeper of Mirth did enter my field once more to bring me the joy and meaning of what it is to be a Rafan, as well as re-induct an old member, now known as Jo Jo the Wonder Somethingorother. We laughed, adventured, and saw the most Jerry Springer like fight. Ahhh, it was good to be back. Buttercup HOO HA!!!!
Name: The TOT
Date: Monday, April 19, 1999 at 00:36:57
Comments:
Chapter 23 The TOT doe'th anxiously await the arrival of his and The Keeper of Friendship's PHISH tickets. Are other Rafans going? We would like to get a heap of our brethern together for a massive feaste at the Alpine Valley show in late July. Let me or either of the Keepers know if you want to go so we can make plans.
Name: KTKOF
Date: Tuesday, April 20, 1999 at 00:05:24
Comments:
Name: Mirth
Date: Tuesday, April 20, 1999 at 09:25:24
Comments:
Chapter 25
And so the most holy of all holidays dids't come. The Keeper of Mirth dids't enjoy the significance of this day much greatly on his way in to work this morning. Also this morning was the last time the Keeper of Mirth would see his car. Ah, the good old Reliant, I will never have to wonder what that sound is and where it is coming from again! Much time was spent removing personal items from the vehicle, including stereo equipment. In the end, it will be all good, since the Keeper of Mirth woulds't be bringing home a new Rafan Party Machine!!!
Who is this guy in my car???
Hoo HA!!! Rafans, Hoo Ha!
Name: Mirth
Date: Tuesday, April 20, 1999 at 13:52:35
Comments:
Chapter 26
The Keeper of Mirth dids't wish every Rafan a very happy 420! Get stoned off your gourd!
Name: Barney Christ
Date: Tuesday, April 20, 1999 at 13:54:48
Comments:
Chapter 27
420-24-7
Name: Mirth
Date: Tuesday, April 20, 1999 at 13:57:16
Comments:
Chapter 28
And the Keeper of Mirth dids't note that on this day, 4/20/99 the Banner ad for the Rafan Homepage was't displayed for the 420th. time on someone else's website! Yay!!!!!
Name: Barney Christ
Date: Tuesday, April 20, 1999 at 16:39:49
Comments:
RAFANS I'm so proud of you all. You have mastered the tools of your age and used them to bring my words to the masses. Keep up the good work and remember --Don't have sex with your roommates, it will only lead to trouble for everyone--- Chapter 29
BARNEY IS CHRIST!
Name: The TOT
Date: Tuesday, April 20, 1999 at 16:45:52
Comments:
The TOT doe'th wish all ye Rafans a very merry 420! Chapter 30
The music store magically finished repairing my bass today! I'ts a week early, and cost half what I expected!!!!!!! HOO-HA!!!!!!!!
Name: KTKOF
Date: Tuesday, April 20, 1999 at 23:55:44
Comments:
Chapter 31
Name: The TOT
Date: Wednesday, April 21, 1999 at 11:27:20
Comments:
I actually had a dream about packing a bowl last night. I had this huge bud, I't was dark green with a bright orange center and it was so sticky and resious that the whole dream was of me trying to manipulate it into the bowl, the entire time I was scraping amber colored hash off of my hands and arms. -mmmmm sticky kind bud, I think I'm going to go back to sleep now. Chapter 32
Name: Scorpi
Date: Wednesday, April 21, 1999 at 12:38:46
Comments:
Chapter 33
A day not yet known to will hold another mind expanding journey
.Old and new concepts will meld and terms will be explained. The negative connotations of a sacred holiday will cease to be a justification of chaos and all the brothers and sisters worldwide will scatter the beans gathered with care throughout the year.
Our host for the annual spring gathering awaited our arrival. The Keeper of Mirth announced his arrival at my gates using his tele-communicator.
"Come forth and ride to the festivities in yonder dark chariot, Infinitely fine in all its accessories and splendor."
With a greeting to my fellow guardians of higher sensibilities and a high five for the slammin ride, we were off to pass the night away in glee and easy vibrations.
The elder spoke of many new and awe inspiring events of that day. We attempted to mentally prepare ourselves to the herbal ital being passed about.
We were not prepared.
